New Plan, New Challenge.

So after having fun with losing the weight from before and gaining some back, (in the tales of Wait…I’m Back?) I couldn’t help but wonder what my next goal would be. Returning to the gym from a two week hiatus, I thought my next challenge would essentially be getting back to where I was and try to keep going from there. Sure, having to try to hit my old maxes from before all over the place is something to aspire to, but it didn’t have the same kind of “targeting mind set” I had before. If I’m going to make any kind of headway, I’d need something to shoot for.

Cut back to last Saturday. A good friend of mine was having her graduation party and had invited myself and the wife to a little outdoor picnic with her family and friends. Sadly, my wife had only gotten home from work two hours before the event and needed to sleep, so I went by myself. The picnic was fun, sweltering hot and full of people I didn’t know, but thankfully enough people I did know to not be bored out of my skull.

I have this running (and incredibly vain) joke with this group of friends, and it involves my ever growing biceps. See, since I’ve been working on my arms, this collective group of females (lucky me) has been monitoring my progress with the weights. I essentially flex like a big lunk and let them squeeze to their hearts content.

All natty bro!

Gentlemen, this is my one word of wisdom. Woman love big arms. Don’t sacrifice your legs to the point where they stand out badly, but a decent arm flex will make your woman feel a little warm. This is scientific fact.

Any way, the party is winding down, and with only a few people left I decide to show off my most recent achievement, the clapping push up. In the grass I show off my ability to do ten in a row before my form starts to turn to shit. The ladies “ooh” and “aah” at my performance, but one of them gets carried away and shouts out my doom.

“One arm push up! One arm push up!”

I’ve made this attempt many times in my military career, and not once have I ever succeeded in performing it. Still, my pride on the line and feeling a bit pumped from my other success, I make the wide legged stance and get my right arm into place. In spectacular fashion, I collapse onto the ground immediately. Everyone expected me to stop, but I got into place and failed again. Struggling, I get up one last time and give it all I’ve got.

It wasn’t a push up, but I did bend my arm a couple inches and pushed myself back to start position. It wasn’t much, but it was improvement.

And thus I found my goal.


I will now work on my strength to this purpose. I won’t care about my weight but more about my ability to perform the elusive push up on both sides of my body. In thirty days I hope to be able to perform five one arm push ups on both sides. The official date will be July 20th, and with any luck I’ll have it done. This might seem like a low goal to some, but it’s a nice starting point for me. If I can make it ten per arm, I’ll come up with a nice reward for the evening (to be determined).

Once again, the gauntlet has been set.

Ready, set, oh God what have I done?


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